At Least It Wasn't...

The whole thing about The Ex posting pictures of MY children (they are only MY children when HE fucks up) shooting the bird kind of exploded today, except in a quiet kind of telephone discussion in my office with the door shut. My goal was to remain completely calm while still sounding slightly pissy, all the while alternately shaming and threatening him into understanding that this is not a laughing matter.

For real, it's not a laughing matter. This is a very clear picture that he posted on facebook of two beautiful little girls sitting in the backseat of his mid-life crisis car, very specifically shooting the bird, with smiles and glee abounding. Uh, are you kidding me? The conversation didn't go very well as it ended up with him claiming that he didn't know the girls were doing that while he was taking the picture (bullshit!), and then claiming that right after taking the picture, he immediately talked to the children about how inappropriate their behavior was (bullshit!), and when questioned by me as to why he even posted it up on facebook, he said that this was just a representation of how life really is (and more bullshit!).

I very nicely told him that I didn't believe him, and he very nicely told me that he didn't care what I believed. I then took it up a notch and told him that I would be reviewing the picture with the older daughter's psychologist, and that I would be following the psychologist's recommendations regarding the matter. He said that was fine. So, I took it up one more notch, and said if the psychologist recommended that I take him back to court to get full custody of the children, then I would be doing that. Silence on his end. And then, I took it up one more notch. Because silence wasn't acceptable. I wanted to feel his ass squirm through the phone. This is what I said. "Do you really think that a judge would believe that you didn't know what the children were doing? Do you *really* believe that? And do you really believe a judge would find it acceptable that you've posted this on facebook for the entire world to see?"  Best part is... this wasn't even my trump card. And no, I'm not telling what the trump card is because I have a sneaking suspicion that I will still have to play the trump card at some point in the future.

The end result? The picture has been removed from facebook. I was less than pleased when I talked to the psychologist today and he told me if the picture has been taken down from facebook, then just leave it alone. No, goddammit, that's not enough. I want this moron to be court ordered to take a parenting class, and then I want him to be court ordered to actually be a good parent. I want him to parent with some common sense, and to at least be big enough to man up when he screws something up. But it's not going to happen like that, and I know it.

I spent some time on Wikipedia tonight reading nothing but the truth, of course, and researching obscene gestures. In the grand scheme of things, I suppose this isn't the worst gesture the children could have used. Okay, flipping someone the bird is bad. It's rude, it's disrespectful and it's horrible to see children doing it.

But I suppose it could have been something along these lines...

The Shocker.

To be followed by The Spocker, The Rocker and the grandaddy of them all, The Show Stopper.

I will say... this is kind of funny since it's not my kid. Funny in that empathetic way of who is the dumbass who taught him THAT? Because that dumbass must be related to the dumbass I married who posted a picture on the internet of my children flipping someone off. It was probably me. Hey, Mom, fucking check us out! No rules! No reading! No bedtime! TV on ALL the time! No vegetables! No protein! No bathing! No hair brushing! Hey, fuck you and your rules, Mommy!

Whoever the mom is in this picture, hey, I feel you, girlfriend. I too hooked up with a dickface and then had children with him. I feel your pain. Parenting would be so much easier if we only had to parent the children.