Friday

I am freaking exhausted. This cheerleading shit is getting old. Just when I feel like I'm starting to really connect with my inner cheerleader, we have a really bad practice and I'm like, fuck this. Can't we just go back to gymnastics or kid-yoga or something? Please? These children could not stand still tonight. They totally killed my Saturday night football game afterglow, which I was still basking in until about five minutes after I arrived at practice. They couldn't stand still, they couldn't put their hands on their hips, they couldn't be quiet, they couldn't listen. However, they could be loud, so I suppose I should just take what I can get. The mom section was getting a little loud, too, and more than once I wanted to turn around and say to them, "Hey moms, if you could kindly SHUT THE FUCK UP I would really appreciate it. K? Thanks". But I restrained myself and just yelled louder. I feel even more coach-ish, because more than once I stopped them mid-cheer and yelled, "No! That's not it! Do it right this time!" Jesus H. Christmas.

The cheer director again failed to make a showing. Hmmm, no surprise there. I wonder if she's avoiding the football director, because he's apparently on crack. He cornered my assistant coach and starting yelling about homecoming and all the shit the cheerleaders need to do and homecoming is in two weeks and what have we done? Uh, hello, we haven't done a damn thing. First of all, why does a youth association need a homecoming? That's what high school is for. High school is very specifically for getting ready for college, getting drunk on the sly, getting laid and getting stoned. And homecoming, where all three of the prior might or might not happen. Depends on the crowd of kids you run with. Anyway, we don't need this in a youth association. Furthermore, I'm getting to the point where I don't give a fuck. He's babbling on, according to my assistant coach, about moon bounces, carnival stuff, a pep rally that Friday night, posters, raffles, the list goes on and on. And then he says he's already dropped about a thousand into it. Well, hoss, that's on you. Because old homeslice here will not be putting any money into this, because we just did fund raising, plus... I already paid $180 for each child to cheer. So the football director can kiss the very whitest part of my ass. If he was single and looked good, maybe we could work something out. But he's neither, so oh well.

I need to pack lunches for tomorrow, finish folding the laundry, pack book bags, clean up the house and get my tired ass to bed. I finally finished my August stuff at work today, and am now plowing into the September work. Because there's no time to get started on September stuff than like, say, September 21st. My grass seed has probably died because we're on mandatory water restrictions, although the water source that's getting low is not where I get my water from, so I don't know why I have to be restricted, too. My gutter pricing came today and the price went up from the estimate? And the job's already done? I'm annoyed that I just went and had it done without a written estimate, but I'll count that as a lesson learned, and in all, I will probably never have to replace these gutters again. I hope. I am incredibly grateful I don't have cheerleading practice tomorrow, because all I really want to do is come home from work, kick off my shoes, make a good dinner for my kids, eat at  the table with my kids, do homework, spend some time hugging and shit, and then watch Survivor.

This weekend coming up is The Ex's. I am so relieved, because I need a break. I can make it til Friday evening, I know I can. I gave him the courtesy call today and reminded him that I won't be available to watch the kids on Saturday while he does the concession stand, so he'll need to make other arrangements. I plan on doing my cheerleading thing, watching my older daughter do her thing, and then coming home and collapsing on the sofa and listening to the golden sound of silence. And then, I'll get up and listen to Justin Beiber and work out a 20 second or so dance routine for the cheerleaders exhibition in late October. Okay, maybe I'll listen to something else and just translate the moves to Justin Beiber at a later time, because who the fuck wants to listen to him if they don't have to?

I can do this. I can make it til Friday evening. Oh, and my mother-in-law will be coming to the football game on Saturday. Lovely. She's never heard my side of the whole divorce story, mainly because she hasn't asked, and I feel like initiating that conversation would be akin to snitching. Sometimes I just want to say, "Well, you raised him. What did you expect?"